The Bogweed Prettacy: AN EDGARCY! - 1.1!

[tigeranne]

SURPRISE! :D

First off, don't worry. The Magpies are coming. I haven't abandoned them! Buuuut, you see, I needed someone really ugly for the next generation to marry, so I told Narrator that she could go ahead and start her prettacy. That way, we'll get to know the person marrying into the Magpies a bit, beforehand. Anyone who's not an heir, will be extracted and put into the Magpies' hood as eligible candidates. :)

So without further ado... Narrator, please tell us what happened.




Here's Edgar, LOL! He's just moved to a field with NO HOUSE and he's got nowhere to sleep. Edgar is very sad LMAO!

Don't feel sorry for him, he's Edgar.


This is his dog Doorstop. He's a direpitbull. Edgar calls him Doorstop because he looks like he's gotten a door repeatively slammed in his mug, and he's as smart as a door-stop.


Look at the house ROFFFL! Edgar's gonna suffar sooo much and I love it! >:D I put up a wall so the neighbours don't have to see Edgar on the toilet, poor innocent souls.


Edgar: Doorstop, your my best and only friend, because your'e too stupid to know better.


Then it started to rain, LOL1


Doorstop: NFMBGMBFDMBGMDBFGDMFBGDFMNBGDMFGBDFMBG

(He's a relly stupid dog.)


It started to hail, ROLF, and Edgar had no place to hide. x) The paperboy was coming walking down the road saying "Oww oww oww!"


Paper Boy: Read the newspaper. It says that an awful man in a flannel shirt and suspenders has just moved in. And he's got a comb-over. He's wanted for crimes in time and space, so call the piloice if you see him.


Paper Boy: OWw oww oww!


Edgar: I haven't seen him. I'll see if he comes by. Bye.


It's important that you feed your pets, even if they're very stupid, so they don't start trying to eat their own tail.


Benedict Humpeldink: I. Hate. My. Job. >:(


Edgar: This is intolerable. They say an axe-murderer lives here.


Edgar was so poor he had to dig for rocks he could sell for pet food.


Garden Snob-Lady: What are you doing digging ugly holes in a beautiful lawn? You're so not in.

Edgar: Be careful so the aze-murderer and the guy in the flannel shirt don't get you! Crazy old bat.


Doorstop was so hungary he started eating the bed.


Edgar: Bad Doorstop! Very bad Doorstop!


Then Doorstop tried to eat the Garden--snob lady.


Edgar found a rock. Like... surprise there are rocks in the dirt, duh.


Doorstop is too dumb to be a guard dog. :)(


And Edgar is very bad at digging up treasures.


Maybe doorstop can help him.


Suddenly the neighbours cane to welcome him to the hood.


One of them was the most beautiful woman Edgar had seen in his life. In this story Aylatani was born with this face - BLEH, so Edgar liked her.


She lived with her evil family next door, and her mother was a bush-fairy.


Edgar started making food because he was hungry. He couldn't cook so he just found some donuts in the fridge. He shoplifted them KEK.


Doorstop liked Aylatani because he could sniff that she wasn't an evil snob, because evil snobs use really heavy perfume that dogs are allergic to.

But they always carry around some poor little chihuahua or pomeranian or something. You know why I think they yap all the time? I think they sneeze from all the perfume and mothballs. But we have story to tell now.


Aylatani: I have to pee. My Dad is still in the bathroom at home reading Zits with his pants down.


Edgar knew he shouldn't look at pretty girls on the toilet, but she was so sexy he couldn't help himself.

Actually no he didn't know. That's giving him too much credit.


He got so distracted that he started putting salt&pepper on the donuts. Why did AF clone them from sandwiches instead of making them ready from the fridge? She obviously doesn't know Edgar.

Lucky her.


LOL, he only made one for himself. The guests could just go home hungry.


Edgar started flirting with Ayatlani because she was very sexy and wore plaid pants.


She was very sexy.


Edgar started to take a shower in case she didn't like sweaty men.


Tabi: I like what I'm seeing, LOL.

HUUURRK! x(


Edgar: Will you hang around for a while if I feed you?

Tani: Sure I'm very hungry.


She was very hungry and Edgar was impressed by her good table manners. <3


He gave her creaky back a good thumping.


Tani: You're such a hot stud and I like your manly beard. It makes you look like you have a chin. :D

Edgar: That's the nicest thing anyone ever said to me. Sniff. :')


Edgar: Aylatina I like your boobs.


She got so happy she kissed him on the nose.

Excuse me, I just have to go vomit a little. That's probably going to happen a lot while I write this. :(

TigerAnne, can you write the next picture?


Okay. Narrator will probably be right back. In the mean time, it looks like Aylatani really likes Edgar.


And the feeling is mutual. I've always kind of shipped these two, hee hee. Narrator is coming back, looking a little green and pale, but alive.


Love makes the hearts pink. :)

If only it was someone nicer who loved someone. But that's not what this story is about.


This was supposed to be a story about Edgar suffering! DOES IT LOOK LIKE EDGAR SUFFERS? DOES IT?!?!??!


AND NOW HE'S NAKKID AGAIN BLUUERK AND I CAN'T DO THIS ANYMORE I MISS MY BEAUTIFUL SIMS!!!


He was so ugly that the random guy on the road got stupid from seeing it.


Oh no he's still naked. :( But Doorstop liked Aylatani, so he wouldn't bite her with his dire pitbull teeth.


Edgar: LOVELY LADY! PLEASE MOVE IN AND BE MY WIFE!

Tani: Nooooo! I can't! I have nightmares that an axe-murdeer kidnaps me because I'm beautiful! So I don't trust men.


But Edgar snogged her to reassure her that he wasn't a murderer.


Tani: You're my best friend. Can I stay here tonight so I don't have more nightmares? My Mom locks me out of the house if I scream so she can't sleep. D:


They crept up all spoony (Bleeerhk!) and slept sweetly throught the night.


The next morning Aylanati wanted to move un. Edgar was happy.


They built a redneck hourse near the street.


Tani tried washing doorstop because he liked to roll in dead skinks.


Now she had her own home with a TV so she could watch her facourite hispotal soaps.


They adopted a nice dog so Doorstop wouldn't feel lonely since Edgar was paying all the attetion to his new GF.


His name was Otis. He started eating the new bed.


Aylatnai took him outside to play so he would get his energy out.


Then Edgar sunk down on one knee and started sining a song by Buckownens. (My granpa likes them.)


Edgar: Aylatanja will U you marry me?

Tani: Yes I want.


They ingaged with much love.


Their marriage was like an Audi, LOL. That's so deep.


Guess what they did, LMAO EWWWW!


Tani: We made a baby!


She got thin! That's not supposed to happen! Where is the baby gonna hide?


But she got fat later. Then she made food with lots of vefetables so the baby could get strong. PS: It's tins.


Edgar: This is rabbit food.


Tani: I want to have a lot of children, like rabbits have.


When you eat stuff your not used to you get gaz.


"Bill, you ARE the father."


Oh no! Violence, aggro and dominatrix!


Doorstop beat up Otis. Now there won't be peas.


Otis would have to move outside.


Edgar: Babies need food with meat and ostrich eggs and jam-rolls.


The babies heard him, LOL. They were hungry.


Edgar: When they grow up we can start a heavy metal band!


Then Aylatani gave birth while a dangerous direwolf watched.


This is Horace.


Edgar: I'm a Dad! Zzz

LOL that pink flower blanket, though!


Aylatani, why are you so stupid you birth babies outside with a wolf, when you have a house?


This is Sprocket. He's a boy. Now get the babies inside before the wolf gets hungry!


Horrace has black hair like his Dad. I hope he doesn't have a combover.


They had to call a babysitter. This isn't Edgar's mother, just so you know. I'm happy they didn't get Callista Desperate this time!


Kendall started feeding the babies a lot of milk.


LMAO I agree!


Edgar got very happy that the stranger lady wanted to take Otis with her home. He hated that dog.


Poor Aylatani. She will suffer for another 300 years. :(


Aylatani: We need a maid.


The babies grow up so fast. Yay!


Horace looks just like his Dad. TigerAnne says it's the best he could hope for, but he can't be heir.


LOL he looks like Gagrganey.


Maybe Sprocket was uglier?


HAKUNA MATATA


He looks too much the same. We need to do atrifiscal insexination.

That's cheating.

I don't care. This is MY prettacy!


HHHNNNNNGGGGGHHHH!


Twins again. But their both boys.


This is Turnip, LOL 4evr!


This is Eggbert. If this was the real Aylatani, she could have had a beautiful gothic baby. Not with Edgar. He needs a haircut.


Narrator? What are you doing? How are Aylatani and Edgar going to take care of all those babies?

They have a babysitter, don't worry.


Yay they are girls!


Look at this ugly baby. It makes me sad. :(


Across the street a lot of bautiful gothic people moved in. :D


Laurelin: I'm so happy that I'm beautiful and have a sexy gothic husband!


Legolas: I'm so happy that I'm a sexy gotich elf, and that I have a beautiful wife!


Ryan: I'm so glad I don't have any trauma in my past.


Adana: I'm just a teenager and I don't know anything about the pleasures of the body, and I especially am not supposed to talk about them with the women who is sumposed to be my mother this time around.


Back at Edgar's place things were less beautiful...


Edgar: I don't know anything about babies, I'm a lumberjack! :(


Edgarr: But all my abbies are beautiful.


Turnip: MOOOOOMMYYYYYYY!!!1!!1!


They made a bedroom for babies in the hallway.


Sprocket: I wike dis toi dat teeches me to pull wabbits eaws! >:)

Rainbow Dash was really sad.


Edgar: This is a bette hair for you son. Now you look like an ugly Beatles.


This is Bolton, she has pretty eyes.


This is Toadstool, she has Edgar eyes.


Aylatani: I want to have 10 babies!

Edgar: Nope.


Otis: I'm so glad that nice woman took me away so I live in a nice home. :)


Edgar got a new job. He's a lab rat.


Kendall: I don't want to have an affair with Edgar!


Lab Rat no more. :(


Edgar is starting to suffer, ha ha ha!


LOLOLOL, I wish Tallie was there to see it!


Edgar: ABOOOOHOOOHOOOOOOO!!!

Kendall: STFU I haven't slept in 36 hours! D:<


Aylatani would rather play games than changing diapers and feed the kids. But she needs to get her fun up, else she gats fired. It was time for the boys to learn to eat solid foods anyway.


Like most of those aren't even spoilt! If he got his lazy ass over there he would find food!


Sprocket ran away. BTW he doesn't have dreads because he's racist. They're nasty white-people dreads that formed because he bites everyone who tries to comb his hair.


Turnip just looked so wrong that the neighbours started putting up gargoyles in their garden to ward him off. But he's not scared of them, because they look like family.


Edgar: I hate my life! >:(

He found a new job in the Army.


Otis kept coming back to see how hoappy he was to not live there.


Turnip: I hate my life!


Toadstoll looked just like her Mom.


Aylatani: You are my prettiest baby! <3


Tani doesn't play favourites. :D


Kendall: I haven't slept in 5 days!

She never went home, LOL!


Tani: Alright, I'll feed the baby. Sheesh!


Such pretty babies, LOL!


Kendall: HeeEEeeeEEellLLLllPPpp meeEEeeeee!


Bolton grew up. She's sooo ugly! TA says I have to choose the ugliest children as heirs, else it's too easy. Bolton is Heir!


Kemndall: I haven't peed in 128 hours!


Edgar: We are contributing to the population!


They really need a maid!


Kendall held it in too long.


Poor Kendall. :( I kind of wish it had been Callista anyway. Then she could have suffered too.


Aylatani: Why did I have so many babbies?! T_T


Eggbert looks like that vulture from the Jungle Book. I know I'm not supposed to watch that film because it's old and anti-SJW, but grandma gave it to us for Christmas before I was born so I have seen it.


Then Karen came. Oh no!


Edgar: Yay, I'm off to the Army! :D I hope they have a war available.


Sprocket ran away from home again.


Karen had to look for him way out in the bush.


Karen: Ooops I peed!

She put dogfood in the bottle, because she knows Sprocket likes that.


Then she left Sprocket to soak in her pee, SMH.


Edgar: Yay I'm home and I killed lots of enemy! :D

He had to wash all the toilets, he killed lots of bugs.


Karen: When can we go home? UwU

Kendall: When they turn 18.


Eggbert grew up. He liked plaid like Ma and Pa.


When he watched news, he saw people suffer more than him and it made him feel happiness.


Sprocket grew up real bad.


Karen had peed SO MUCH.


The kids got bunk beds. Some of them had to sleep in the living room.


Now Horace was bigger too.


And Turnip. He's Heir with Bolton.


Doorstop liked Sprocket, because he has an even flatter face.


Then the kids were off to school. I hope they don't blow it up and drop the chimney on the Headmaster.


Edgar: HUHUJIJHUJHIUJHIJUIHJHUUIUJHIUJHIIJHUIJHUIHJHUIUIUJHIUIIJIJHIUHUI!




aYLATANI: AKWNKWNAKWNAKWNAKWNAKWNASNEKSNEKNSKEAKNSKNKNKSENKSNEKSN.


Edgar: LOL, the kids are at school! Let's have fun! >:)

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Oh dear...

Comments

[alittlestrange.livejournal.com]

YAY THE EDGARCY BEGINS! I must drop everything and read! Narrator's prejudice against Edgar should be hilarious. I hope Edgar gets to be immortal.

I love Aylatani's style in this neighborhood. XD It's like totally 80s!

Actually no he didn't know. That's giving him too much credit.

I LOLed.

Tabi: I like what I'm seeing, LOL.

HUUURRK! x(

LOL!

At least Narrator doesn't have to deal with my pictures that lack the censor blur. X)

Their marriage was like an Audi, LOL. That's so deep.

And a wonderful observation!

Guess what they did, LMAO EWWWW!

XD

Always the aggro pets! And what's the first thing the game churns out? Parental clones. Of course. At least Sprocket got Aylatani's ears.

Wow, Turnip knocked the wind out of me, and Eggbert made me giggle.

Yay deh sterbloms mobe in!

OH TURNIP. YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL.

Keep running, Sprocket, or the SJWs will get you and rip off your hair!

Kendall held it in too long.

Yeah, 128 hours is asking a bit too much of a babysitter.

YAY TURNIP AND BOLTON DOUBLE HEIRS!

Such funs! Wnat moarz!

[tigerannesims2.livejournal.com]

Edgar and Aylatani will be around 5ever to see how their dynasty pans out!

I was SOOO happy with how Turnip turned out! :D Poor Eggbert, though... You'll see what I mean.

Edgar is the reason I have censor blur!

It wasn't fun to only have the Maxis townies walk by, so of course Aylatani's original descendants had to live in the new hood! I've even made adult versions of Adana and Riana - Alana and Donna (Gothic!) - so they can marry Ryan and William and have lots and lots of babies. Poor Ethan, he'll have to find someone else this time.

Bolton is glorious. She doesn't get any prettier with time, to my great joy!

I'm going to start writing on the next update soon. Watch this space...

[alittlestrange.livejournal.com]

Good! Then Narrator can enjoy comparing the much prettier later generations to GRRR EDGAR!!1 I'm glad Aylantia will stick around, too! I've got her in my Dimwit and Duckling neighborhoods now, and she's quite the woman about town. She always appears at community lots. Iris and Ben are teens in the Ducklings' neighborhood, because we are quite short on interesting teens. All we had were Abhijeet Turner and Amar Hamilton, who...uh...met a sticky end. X)

Turnip is HILARIOUS. That closeup of him screaming in his crib! But I'm glad Botlon will be heir too because armagarsh! What a mess!

Aww, Ryan and Adana finally get to be together in a new and not-at-all-squicky incarnation.

[tigerannesims2.livejournal.com]

Yes! :) Or at least Ryan and Alana will get together, if they want each other. I've set up their turn-ons to make it likely. Funny enough, I didn't realise when I named her "Alana" that it's almost the same name as a girl who has a crush on the Ryan-character from my other story. Her name is Alanna.

Adana exists here too, as you will see in the next update, but she's a regular teen this time.

[simlili.livejournal.com]

An Edgarcy :D

Doorstop! <3

Aw, Edgar found love. There's hope for all of us!

Audi marriage, omg XD Good one, Narrator.

"Bill, you are the father." :D

____________
All right I'm laughing at every picture so I'm going to stop commenting each one with an inept smiley, okay?
Poor, poor Kendall though :D How wonderful to see the nannies suffer, hehehe. Especially that bitch Karen Gast! Poor Kendall is one of the more "competent", if you can say any of them is. But still it's good to see them suffer, all of them. Sorry, Kendall!

The children are awesome! As was to be expected but still. Some do look like their parents too much, predictable too, but look at Turnip! He's a real rockstar!
The heir has huge, huge potential too.

I'm so happy you started an Edgarcy :D

[tigerannesims2.livejournal.com]

I felt pretty sorry for Kendall on the fourth day. When she was awake, she did nothing but shuttle between the fridge, the kids and the trash. I think she was crying at one point, too! I haaaaate Karen! Every time I've gotten her as the nanny, the first or second thing she's done is pee herself!

Both Turnip and Bolton will be heirs, because they both have crazy potential in breeding ugly! There will be more Edgarcy over the Holidays, I think. :)

[simsuru.livejournal.com]

Just what I needed right now! :D I was feeling quite anxious and melancholy but this post just changed my mood completely! I can't remember when was the last time I laughed this much. So thank you! :D

I just started my own prettacy a few days ago so it's interesting to read yours. I think I lost count on how many babies were born in this update. They all look wonderful! :D

That picture of Turnip crying in the crib... I might have to save it on to my computer and watch it every time I feel down. xD

And yay for nanny misery! They all deserve it. Though I think after killing a few of the original nannies the rest haven't been THAT bad. Though they still keep peeing everywhere.

[tigerannesims2.livejournal.com]

Nothing makes me happier than being told I made someone else feel better, so thank you! <3 I hope you're feeling alright today!

They had six babies, poor little Sims. Never again, LOL!

I'll check out your prettacy for sure.

[aegagropilon (from livejournal.com)]

Turnip and Bolton are magnificent. They're troll true beauties!

[tigerannesims2.livejournal.com]

They really are something special. x) Best part is that they get uglier as they grow up. I was worried their features would become more balanced, but nope.